Are you living all you can? If so, you are one of the few lucky souls that either was born with an incredible spirit - OR one of us who had to learn it the hard way. You can learn to live life to the fullest. It takes practice to defeat the habits that hold you back.

What keeps most people from living each day, each moment, to the fullest? Three things: Worry, Regret, and Fear.

Worry is living in the future instead of the moment. Worry is a pessimistic approach to life. When you live in worry, you're constantly asking 'what if this happens?', 'and if this happens, what if that happens?'

You trade your life for shadowy possibilities, piling one on top of the next until the weight of 'what if' pins you in your pessimism.

Regret is living in the past instead of the moment. Regret is a shameful approach to life. You look behind you, and wish things were different. You constantly tell yourself 'if only I'd done that differently', and 'if I had done that differently, I'd be there instead of here'.

You trade your life for guilt and sorrow, examining every decision until your second-guessing becomes paralysis and you stop moving forward.

Fear is living in uncertainty instead of now. Fear is a timid approach to life. When you live in fear, you hold back, denying yourself and others a world of possibilities.

You trade your life for scenes of things that could go wrong, and the movie you create keeps you in your seat, alone in a dark theater.

The antidote to worry is refocusing on NOW. Right this moment. What do you see, what do you smell, what do you taste, what is in your lap and in your life right this minute? This is what's real.

The cure for regret is two-fold: acceptance and forgiveness. It is what it is. You are where you are. You cannot change what was, you can only build on what is. You did the best you could with all of your resources at that moment. It's what you will do NOW that matters.

The solution for fear is faith. You have been protected and provided for right up to this very minute. It will continue. Do good for others; trust you will receive good in return.

Take an inventory of the things you have to be thankful for, and you will see the big picture.

This moment will never come again. Savor it for all it is NOW. Direct your attention toward the people and places and things you experience NOW.

References

1. Shrestha SS, Swerdlow DL, Borse RH, Prabhu VS, Finelli L, Atkins CY, et al. Estimating the burden of 2009 pandemic influenza A (H1N1) in the United States (April 2009-April 2010). Clinical Infectious Diseases 2011;52(suppl. 1):S75-82. Available from: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/21342903

2. Guo RN, Zheng HZ, Li JS, Sun LM, Li LH, Lin JY, et al. A population-based study on incidence and economic burden of influenza-like illness in south China, 2007. Public Health 2011;125(6):389-95. Available from: http://www.livinglifefully.com/flo/floarticles.htm

3. Dawood FS, Fiore A, Kamimoto L, Bramley A, Reingold A, Gershman K, et al. Burden of seasonal influenza hospitalization in children, United States, 2003 to 2008. The Journal of Pediatrics 2010;157(5):808-14. Available from: http://www.hot-cigs.biz/cigarettes/marlboro

4. Simmerman JM and Uyeki TM. The burden of influenza in East and South-East Asia: a review of the English language literature. Influenza and Other Respiratory Viruses 2008;2(3):81-92. Available from: http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19453467

5. Seffrin J, Hill D, Burkart W, Magrath I, Badwe R, Ngoma T, et al. It is time to include cancer and other noncommunicable diseases in the millennium development goals. CA: A Cancer Journal for Clinicians 2009;59(5):282–4. Available from: http://caonline.amcancersoc.org/cgi/reprint/59/5/282

The Energy of Desire

The energy of desire is a powerful motivator and creative force. Yet our desires must be stated clearly with the rewards of success in mind.

Desire and the energy it creates affect our intentions and actions.  However, it is important to distinguish between desire motivation and fear motivation.  We are either moving toward something we want, or, as my client was, away from something we do not want.

Fear motivation aims to protect and focuses on penalties for failure leading to feelings of inhibition (e.g., "I can't") or compulsion (e.g., "I have to").  Desire motivation seeks rewards for success. It leads to volition (e.g., "I can") and propulsion (e.g., "I want to").

Not initially knowing where he would go next, my client was moving "from" an undesired position, mistakenly motivated by penalties for perceived failure.  Of course, he had not failed; his job had failed him.  The way we express our feelings will shape our beliefs, intentions and actions, often without our awareness.